Slow Sanctification

I think one of my greatest frustrations throughout my life is that it constantly seems as if, for me, sactification occurs at the speed of a slug on salt. Why some of the most basic problems with my character (which I don't think I want to delve into in a public blog yet) just never seem to reach resolution, regardless of how hard I feel I'm working to fight against them, remains simply a mystery to me.

John, in his sermon last Sunday, told a story about a well-respected minister who fell into adultery, and when inquired about the event, stated that it happened because he had forgotten or disbelieved that there was enough evil and enough sin within him to destroy the world three times over. I have only just in the last month or so truly realized the horrible truth of that statement.

I want to be sanctified. I want to be like Christ. I would imagine that probably everyone who is a true believer (and, on some level, many who aren't) would say the same thing. I want to be a good person. But I seem to fall so radically short of that on a minute by minute basis. My thoughts rarely (if ever) put others before myself, and that translates to my actions, which are equally selfish.

If I looked at my life five years ago, I can honestly look and say that, yes, my life has gotten better since then. There are things that I did when I was 15 that I wouldn't do now. But with all the sin that remains with which I still struggle, that just seems to be of incredibly little value.

All there is to do is look to the Cross of Christ and remember that I can't change myself. I continue to rely on the changing work of the Holy Spirit, because without that, I am stuck in my sin and shame. And I know that. I know and remember that the Cross is my salvation both for the future (as all Christians remember) and for the present (which many forget). But a lot of times I have trouble taking that knowledge and transferring it to my day to day thoughts and actions. And that is the root of all the remaining evil in me.

I need to continue to remember the Gospel in mind and in heart...

Luke